Are we at recess or in the white house?

I am jumping right in this week, because I don’t mess around when it comes to something that hits close to home. And neither does this community or their advocates when we have been disrespected. What am I speaking of? Well, Trump decided he needed to make comments on Governor Newsom’s very honest and real truth that he shared, that he has dyslexia. His comment I will not repeat here, because it disgusts me.

What I will address is why the comment that not only our President made, but many others assume and feel the need to express, is so completely disgraceful and honestly reflects on the intelligence of the one making such comments.

I could list a ton of celebrities, millionaires, billionaires, and so to prove my point – but I am not going to do that, because these people get pointed out a lot. They deserve the recognition that they get in the mental health, learning differences, advocacy world, 100%. But I am going to focus on the facts and the people I’ve watched, who blow this comment to a million pieces.

The family pictured above, aka my family, we are a walking, talking, breathing case study on thriving with many different learning disabilities. My brother and I have the tests to prove it, my mom and dad haven’t been tested, but through all the years of advocating and educating themselves, it is highly likely that they have some too. Now, this isn’t to say that having hiccups in learning is a walk in the park, because it certainly is NOT! And it doesn’t mean we haven’t been called the “S” word or told we wouldn’t ever make it, we have! Heck, if we were caught calling someone this, something would be taken away- tv, phone, etc.

Allow me to take you back to the mid-80s, very little accommodations were available, and very few teachers/administrators were equipped with the tools to help. Not only were they not equipped, but the pressure for earlier and earlier learning standards were beginning to be placed on schools. A good population of teachers had been through lots of transition and merging of schools. None of these are excuses for the teachers behavior during this time, because you should certainly not treat a child like some children were, for sure! Which meant the advocacy fell on the teachers, administrators, aids, fellow classmates, and parents.

Think about this for a moment: finding resources, information, doctors, advocating without the internet, and beyond that no computer, maybe a typewriter.

I really hope you thought long and hard about the above sentence, because today it’s easy to say, “let me look the up.” However, it was blood, sweat, tears, driving place to place, libraries, the phone book, networking through letters and phone calls. How do I know this? I have physical evidence of it – years worth. I have verbal evidence, not only from my family but from friends and strangers. When it came to my brother and I, no stone was left unturned. We were taught we were worth fighting for- by actions and by words. I can still remember the typewriter keys typing away at night, didn’t know if they were adding an amendment to the constitution or holding school administrators accountable, but whatever was being written was being written with great intention.

Not only did my parents advocate for us, they taught us to advocate for ourselves and others. We knew our diagnosis’ at an early age, what exactly they meant, how they effected our daily lives, the medicine we took, what each medicine was for, the name, the dosage, when we took it. When we went to our doctors appointments, the nurses and doctors asked us the questions and then allowed them to comment. We knew we were capable and had great potential. We knew we had many cheerleaders, not fake-rainbow-shooter type of cheerleaders, but real, had our back cheerleaders. And this has come full circle, because we have had the privilege to advocate for our children with any needs that they have or have had.

I’m not sure what our President would define as “intelligent,” I am assuming this is his opposite definition of what he was calling Governor Newsom. And I’m not sure how you would define it. I know that we have to study IQ for different diagnosis and levels in schooling, but I’m not a huge fan of putting a significant amount of energy into it, because there is more to a person than what the IQ score is. If you don’t test well, for example, your IQ can be significantly affected.

Here’s my thinking on “intelligence:”

• Can you make a decision on your own?
  • If yes, you got it! This is a life skill that is basic and will be one of the foundational skills you will need to build on for the rest of your life.
• Are you curious? Are you asking questions?
  • If yes, awesome! Education isn’t just school. Education starts the moment we become our own set of genes and cells. We begin to learn about life, how things work, cause and effect, we start to learn from our environment and those who are around us. Ask questions, search for the answers, you may not always find the answer, but continue to search. Don’t ever stop asking!
• Learning Disability, Asthma, Migraines?
  • Are you learning the in a way that works for you? Medicine, therapy, accommodations, research. Amazing! Well done my friend. Just because I don’t comprehend as well doesn’t mean I stop reading, it means I listen to audio versions sometimes. Just because one rescue medicine works for 50% of the population, doesn’t mean it will work for me or you. We are all unique individuals- we must treat each other as such.
• Are you continuing to learn?
  • A piece of paper saying you have a degree or certification, doesn’t get you very far if you are not willing to learn. My thoughts on “further education” after high school is this: Congrats! You made it through what is basically mandatory for a good percentage of jobs. If you have the desire to have a career, not just a job, in something that requires college, go for it, we need you. If you have a desire to have a career that you can start an apprenticeship in high school, take advantage of this, make sure you really like it, we also need you. If you are burnt out and need a breather, there are jobs out there for you, we need you. The world would like to tell you otherwise, but there are jobs. They may not be high paying, tidy and clean jobs, but get your foot in the door, build your experience. P.S. I’ve done this, and it’s a very rewarding thing! I have learned so much more than any professor could have taught me! We need plumbers to electricians to servicemen and women to doctors to nurses to cleaning staff to teachers to interpreters to scientists to moms and dads to all who are in between, we need all of us!!!

I will admit I don’t have an abundance of compassion for people who are unwilling to see past their own story, especially when it comes to insulting and disrespecting human life with careless comments. But this has made me angry, furious, and at the same time has broke me. It’s not a secret that our President comes from a family that had some sort of mental health that needed to be addressed, but was ignored. But what has broke me the most is that he has said that his youngest son has challenges. He obviously is extremely intelligent because he has been credited for getting his dad back in the white house. But my heart aches because you never want to hear these words come out of anyone when you already battle with yourself to take the next step, but your own family, that’s just cruel. You may say or think he tunes it out, well, I am telling you, you can only tune it out for so long, it will catch up at some point and you have to confront it.

This post is not a us vs them debate. I hope that it will be a thought provoking post that either creates conversation with others or creates a stirring in yourself to re-evaluate how you think, speak, and act towards the mental health, learning differences, and others community.

We all need each other, period. The division is no where near healthy. Those being caught and held accountable that I am witnessing at the moment has given me some hope. I have never thought to pray this prayer for our nations leaders, but I have been these past couple weeks!

Life Book of the Week: Just Juice, by Karen Hesse