Two Minute Speeches

I recently watched a Parenting/Grandparenting Virtual Conference (yes, you read right. I would love to one day have Aunt/Uncle/GRANDfriends resource website/book/or part of this blog just for that someday, but as for now, I subscribe to Grandparenting sites and newsletters.). On this virtual conference there were a set of grandparents who gave some great suggestions for dinner family time. One was two minute speeches.

Since this past weekend was a long weekend for my niece and nephew, they came to stay with us! We were able to celebrate my niece’s upcoming birthday and have an extended quality time with them. So at one of our meals, I suggested what I thought would be fun, two minute speeches, they were OVERJOYED! Okay, let me take a brief pause, if you know our family, we are constantly moving, tapping, wiggling, you get the picture. Sitting down can be somewhat of a chore, but in my opinion, it is a life skill that is a necessary one. Back to them being overjoyed, they were all in. Technically I believe the grandparents from the conference were meaning a “prepared” speech, but again, not going to happen in our family and there really isn’t a need, we are talkers.

So we dove in! My niece went first, her subject school. She nailed it. Next was my Mom, they chose cars for her subject. She filled most of 2 minutes. My turn, they chose my subject to be water. I said “water” a lot! Then it was my Dad’s turn, they chose electronics for his subject. This was just downright funny, because they know his frustration and his need for them to help him with electronics 😊. Then my nephew, he was all in with everyone else participating, but then didn’t want to do it. This is where my “Miss Anna” vs. NaNa kicks in. (all the kids I kept, you know what I am talking about 😊) I do not like when adults believe they have the right to humiliate children, BUT I do believe that participation around the table in the safety of your home/grandparents and aunt’s home, surrounded by your family, is absolutely the best place to grow, learn, and begin to build confidence that the outside world will never be able to offer. So we didn’t nag, we just waited. We allowed him to pick his subject and told him to let us know when he was ready, no rush, but we all must participate. Not too long after he says, “I’m ready. Cars.” And good grief, did he hit it out of the park! He named makes, models, parts, types of cars. And most importantly, he was smiling ear to ear, because he knew he was worth the wait, his participation was indeed wanted, because we all believed he could and would, with flying colors!

Why am I sharing this?

1. Sitting for a meal is possible!
2. It’s about the people in the chairs, not the food on the table or the presentation. Yes, we need to be aware of what we eat, but if a meal is prepared by say Chick-fil-a or bojangles or a restaurant, it can still be shared around the table, and have just as much value, because of the people sharing the meal.
3. This game kept them in their seats, but it did far more than that. It created more conversation. More bonding and connecting. Memories. Moments. Time that we won’t have again, simply because it was that moment that we were given.
4. Kids need to know that they are heard. Two minute speech and everyone listening, you are meeting very basic yet extremely vital and essential needs for children.
5. Kids are carrying more information and receiving more conflicting messages, more than ever before. Just to name a few: diversity, overwhelmed by making their college application “look just right”, do more, be more, whatever it takes, define (or belittle) yourself by choosing pronouns, the tech generation, generation generalizations, be busy, be smart, be active, be you, empower… Try some of these for two minutes speeches.

So what’s my point? My point is this, the children we are raising now are unlike any that have come before us. Why? The biggest reason, they are being raised by and with screens/technology. The generation before, grew with the advancement of technology. Example: I’m thirty-five, my early years consisted of a TV with no remote, just the knobs on the tv for channel and volume, and a big ole’ antenna. We had a Mac that had a reader rabbit game on it, and some software that could make banners for our birthdays 😂. My Paw-Paw was the only one in the family with a working up to date computer for years. When the VCR came along, this was a down right miracle. You could record shows? WOW! Between the VCR and now, just think about how much technology has come along: cassettes, CDs, DVDs, BluRay, streaming, 24/7/365 news channels, DVR… ALL of this is now at our kids fingertips…

I mean no disrespect when I say this, but when we as adults tend to let one thing get under our skin, we are most likely missing the even bigger picture and larger issue. Example: People posting their “pronouns,” well I know a kid who has had it with this ordeal, and if asked one more time, is going to respond, “Walmart-Trash Bags.” Simply Fed Up. I believe, because she knows it’s an attention getter and the larger issue is they simply want to be heard and understood. (disclaimer: I am not endorsing any pronouns besides the ones that are God-given! And yes we both know those are not actual pronouns)

I have no magic solution. And honestly don’t think there is one.

Yet, I do know that they can teach us a whole lot more about what we don’t know is going on in the outside world, and it is critical that we no longer continue to ignore or silence them.

Life Book of the Week: Screens and Teens, by Kathy Koch. I actually haven’t finished this one yet, but the way she approaches technology and the way we must accept that it’s apart of our lives and it’s here to stay, yet we must not let it rule us, is fantastic.

The picture today is my niece’s Pooh bear, which was her Mom’s. The t-shirt was her Dad’s (my brother) K-4 class shirt, somewhere around 37 years old. I love this, because it is the external and material view of what we all long for internally and eternally. Loved, heard, understood, seen, no matter how worn or frail or restitched. Fully Known and Fully Loved.