Broken Pieces
Let’s start today’s post with some lyrics:
" Look at all the broken pieces all around me places deep inside my soul I don't know what's real, can't help the way I'm feeling All I know is I'm alone. I need a rescue, I need a reckoning From all the things I've done and have been don't to me I need a revival, I need recovery I need to know that there's an answer for what's missing cause something's missing Turn up all the music, something to amuse me silence is a lonely friend if you really knew me, could you really love me save me from this loneliness It feels like I fell into a hole to deep to climb out and i looked up to the sky and saw You reaching down. You are the rescue, You are the reckoning From all the things I've down and have been done to me You are revival, You are my recovery I know that You're the answer to what's missing Because You love me." Ellie Holcomb, Rescue
I’m not going to lie. I have tapped play on this song to remind me that He does love me, more than I can count in the last few weeks. I know I don’t deserve it for sure, but that doesn’t matter, His love is an absolutely, no matter what love!
The album that this song is on, is actually one that I listened to while I was waiting on Lucy. “Wonderfully Made” was a prayer that I prayed for her life giving mom as I waited, and then continued to pray over her and Lucy when she arrived. The even more amazing, all praise to God, Lucy would relax and settle when I would play this album. Granted I did listen to it a lot, so I could sing most of the songs to her, but it was like she had heard it or Ellie Holcomb’s voice was a familiar calming voice. So not only is this whole album special to me because of the journey to Lucy, it is a comfort when I am missing her physical presence. I encourage you to at least look it up and look at some of the lyrics from other songs, you cannot deny the love of God!
As for why I write about this particular song today, well, have you ever been at a place in life when you ask yourself, “can I possibly be more broken than I am in this moment?” and then you find out, yes I can, a lot more broken! (kind of like the leaf in the picture above) I’ve landed there many times in my life, but this week seems to be a blowout. When I have come up for breath, it gets knocked out of me again, you following me? It’s not like a devastating blow- its just piece of my heart keep crumbling. On one hand I am really thankful I have a heart that feels deeply. On the other hand, it stinks to have a heart that feels and wants to fight for what’s right and what seems necessary.
But I am only one person, with a unique story to tell, to live, to embrace.
The “R”s in this song, I believe, are very powerful in the order that they are written into the lyrics:
Rescue: to save someone from a distressing or dangerous situation.
Reckoning: way of thinking/evaluation.
Revival: turn for the better.
Recovery: return to a normal state of health, mind, or strength.
The lyric “It feels like I fell into a hole too deep to climb out, and I looked up to the sky and saw You reaching down.” The rescue begins when I choose to look up – and the rescue is not just when I accepted Jesus and started dally walking with him – no the rescue is everyday-every moment. My own way of thinking – must be reckoned with daily. He is Revival- because He only can turn my brokenness into His will. Whether that be more fight, more rest, more words, more reflection. And everyday is a step towards recovery- listening, reading, praying, crying out when needful, sharing, all with the absolute hope of a full recovery on the other side of heaven!
Keeping our eyes on Him, we press on! Are you with me?
Life Book of the Week: The Old Woman Who Named Things, by Cynthia Rylant (if you know my mom- you will want to read this one 😊 Love you Mommy!)
