Walking in Truth

I’m back! 😊 I had to take a pause last week to digest some life and celebrate my little girl! I am still a bit foggy, so hang in there with me today!

My new year started off with celebrating the coming together in marriage of one of the kids, now a man, and his now wife! I cannot express how honored I have been to be able to witness these “kids,” now mature adults, grow and seek God’s will for their lives! In 3 John 1:4, it says, “I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in truth.” This captures my every emotion! I have a strong belief that as the Church we are to all gather around children and families and be apart of helping them walk in truth. Parents, of course, come first, but they are not to do this alone! Honestly, I have learned this from my parents and their prayer group. I also witnessed with the group that I kept every week for multiple years, in which this now married man was apart of. And may I note, I only attend events this late at night for someone this special! ❤️ I didn’t make it until midnight, but I did make it for a few good dances on the dance floor!

As I reflected on the wedding – the ceremony, the couple, the families, the guests etc – first, I had to giggle a little because some of the people in attendance I hadn’t seen in a while or I would be talking to someone and someone new would come to talk to us and the person I knew would introduce me (or I would introduce myself) as the small group babysitter, or everybody’s babysitter. I am very honored by these titles! For one thing I love children and investing in them as our future generations. Second, I started babysitting (paid- I’ve always love having kids around 😊) as a freshman in high school, and really started keeping kids the summer before my junior year of high school, when I had decided that this is what makes my heart come alive. And I worked hard to do the job well, with integrity, and not just “babysit,” but invest in the lives of children – for the long haul – graduation – marriage – babies – whatever God has for them. I actually think a lot about the children I lost touch with – where they are – how they are doing.

As I began talking to some of the people I knew, I slowly started realizing how much life had been lived in the “in between” of seeing each other. Let me try to paint this picture: 1. If you are familiar with Young Life, then you will probably understand the dynamics a little bit better – the relationships stretch far and wide and move around quite a bit! My family and I have been involved with this ministry since my brother was in high school – so somewhere around 1998. We were really active until around 2010ish. And then my niece came and I started a small business and we had to back off a bit. 2. The small group that I mentioned above I keep in contact with on a pretty regular basis and also had a big part of my adoption story. 3. It’s been a good 10 years since I have done any (paid) childcare. 4. My jobs in childcare were pretty much always in two neighboring cities. So the people who moved about in the same circles – knew who I was and I knew who they were, even if I didn’t babysit for them. Make sense? I hope so!

Life is a crazy wild adventure! And my brain sometimes just wants to slow down. Let me tell you why. I watched most of the kids I kept grow up, but then there are some that it’s been 10 years or more since I have seen them. When you don’t see someone for a while they tend to stay the same in your mind. So when you see them or hear about them – your mind is blown. This is what happened to me. Speaking with one family that I didn’t babysit for but I did know their kids, started telling me the ages and what their children were doing, I about fainted! They aren’t children anymore, they are adults! Mind blown!

Then that left me to answer, What about you? What has your life been like since I last saw you? Umm. Honestly, my head started swirling. Music was playing. I’m all the sudden struck with the realization, “They don’t know! How do they not know? Oh man, how do I tell them in this environment?” They had no clue I had adopted, that she came, and that I watched her run back to Jesus soon after. I told them as well and as clear as I could about the miracle of Lucy. Not quite how I usually share our story, but that is what my life has consisted of since they last saw me.

Now this is what I have been pondering: I know some of these people, have similar acquaintances, who were not in attendance, that know Lucy has come and ran home. So here’s my question: we are quick to share when someone’s parent has passed, or if someone has cancer- these things tend to spread like we are playing telephone as kids – but when it comes to infant loss or miscarriage, what makes us think this doesn’t need to be shared? All these circumstances desperately need prayer! Why do we deny others the opportunity to pray or reach out?

Maybe you feel as if it’s that persons story to tell. Let me speak for myself… sure I have our story to tell. I also don’t like that the world finds it easier to talk about a person who has had years of life, but can’t find the guts to talk about life that may have had a short life in the womb or outside the womb- because a life is A LIFE. And for every life that had a short time – there is a family that is grieving a whole lifetime, a life missing everyday, little to no memories of holidays or firsts. So do me and all my fellow grieving parents a favor- ask for prayer for them, especially of the people that you know, know them. You don’t have to tell our stories- we can and should do that.

And my fellow grieving parents – speak up – invest in telling your story – say their names. Your children matter no matter how long they lived! LIFE, celebrate it!

Book of the Week: Grief is like a Snowflake, by Julia Cook